Just like its easier to get a job when you already have a
job it’s easier to get a date when you already have a date. When you’re not in the dating flow it seems
that people can pick up on the energy that you are out of the loop looking
in.
One of the themes of Dapper Carter’s 8 Rules of Dating is
how people can sense your desperation when you are trying to date
again. It’s like they have a sixth sense
that you’re not getting any play. Dapper
had to incorporate strict rules into his dating experience in order not to be
took advantage of. His rules were (1)
not to talk too much, (2) go somewhere cheap on a first date because you may
not see this person again, (3)f we’re friends we can split the check but if we’re
having sex then I'm paying, if you’re at my house after midnight then we’re
having sex (its like feeding a gremlin), treat the hos like queens and treat
the queens like hos (that goes for both men and women), never have threesomes with people you care about, the only
thing better than cookies are new cookies, and whatever it is you’re looking
for from a relationship that’s what you have to give in a relationship. My personal favorite is rule number three. I had found myself in the position far more
often than I liked where I would hear “Alan I like you as a friend” but yet and
still I was always the one reaching in my pocket. If we’re friends no problem, then we should
be able to go Dutch once in a while, right?
But if we are actually sleeping together than I had no qualms springing
for the meal. It was the least I could
do.
I don’t think people take advantage of other people with any
malicious intent but if you put yourself in that position then its buyer beware. Are you the only one paying for meals? Do you only get booty called late at
night? It’s up to you to put a spending
cap on dinners, time limit on late night visits, and address the boundaries of
your friendship with the other person. Sometimes you're the pigeon and sometimes you're the statue.
A lot of us have done the “taking advantage of” thing
whether it be accepting a free dinner or drinks with no intentions of
furthering the relationship or blowing a person off because they are too
interested and too available. Not to
mention many of us have gotten the short end of the stick and been on the
bottom of the dating totem pole committing dating faux paux’s of over
eagerness, lack of confidence, volunteering too much personal info too soon,
and lack of common sense.
If anyone has funny dating experiences (I'm sure it wasn’t
funny at the time) in which you feel like you played the sucker and was taken
advantage of let us know.
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